Failure's Not Flattering
by FatBoySlim
Summary: Abby's sick of Lizzie's groping to Nigel. So she does something about it. But will it backfire? AbbyNigel. Sonfic as well Please R&R Soon to be a real story too.
1. Ch 1: Failure's Not Flattering

Disclaimer: I don't own the KND or Cartoon Network. I wish I owned New Found Glory though. My name is NewFoundDude and I am new to writing KND fics. Hopefully, all the great authors here will welcome me here. Please enjoy!! Uses the new hit single by NFG, entitled "Failure's Not Flattering  
  
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"Oh Nigey, I'm here for our date," said a certain fat, red haired girl with glasses. "I hope you bought me flowers this time  
Nigel Uno, leader of the Kids Next Door, looked down from the deck of the KND tree house and saw his "girlfriend" Lizzie, the most annoying SOB on the face of the Earth. Sometimes, Nigel wished Lizzie would just disappear.  
  
What's your problem?  
  
Can't you see it?  
  
And you go and blow it  
  
Like everyone knows you will  
  
Lizzie would find any excuse to annoy the Brit, such as waking him up in his sleep and dragging him away from his team for many hours. Everybody on the KND tried to get rid of Lizzie, with no avail. They even hired the Yakuza (Japanese mafia) to get rid of the little girl. However, each member of the Yakuza ran away in fear. Number 5 seemed to get annoyed when Lizzie was around for long periods of time for some odd reason. (Gee, I wonder why!?? Perhaps, jealously of Lizzie getting all of Number 1's time!??)   
  
Don't leave this rock unturned  
  
Cause you could like what you find  
  
A sure-shot hit with your name attached to it  
  
Will you not keep me in mind?  
  
"Wut does Number 1 see in that stupid, cruddy girl anyway?" asked Number 4 one day as Lizzie "invited" herself over one day to spend the day with her "Nigey".  
Number 5 shook her head at Number 4 and said, "Number 5 knows Number 1 don't like Lizzie, but is too much of a coward to say anything."  
"But Number 1 is our leader! ÔOw can he be scared of a fat, ugly girl like that?" asked the Aussie as he stared in disbelief at Number 5.  
"Simple, he has to be polite, or face the risk of being eating alive by Lizzie," Number 5 told Number 4. "ButÉ. yesÉ.Number 5's got a plan. A plan to get rid of Lizzie once and for all."   
  
I won't cast the first stone or leave the first mark  
  
But I will leave a lasting impression  
  
You believe what you want and you've said what's been said  
  
And I do hope you learn a lesson  
  
I do hope you learn a lesson  
  
"Oh Nigey, I had so much fun today. I always enjoy it when it beat the hell out of those stupid adults," said Lizzie as she clung to Number 1 on the KND's couch.  
Number 1 looked down at her and sighed, "It's no problem Lizzie, really, and all you have to do is----"  
"Oh Nigey, tell me again what you did for me again," the red- head said as she looked at her "boyfriend" waiting for Nigel to tell her again how many adults he beat up and how he did it.  
  
What's your problem?  
  
Can't you see it?  
  
And you go and blow it  
  
Like everyone knows you will  
  
Number 5 looked on at the "couple" on the couch and shook her head and said, "Time for Number 5 to unleash her secret weapon and break up this Kodak moment".   
  
Don't look too hard for what you want  
  
Cause it could be on the tip of your tongue  
  
You're holding back like there's nothing left to it  
  
Could this be a false alarm?  
  
Number 5 stepped right in front of the happy couple and grinned broadly at both of them and said, "I hate to this to you right in front of your date Number 1, but you left THESE in my room last night," said Number 5 as she held up a pair of Rainbow monkey underwear.  
Lizzie looked at the underwear and ran screaming from the room faster than she had ever run before.   
"Damn, fat white girl can run," said Number 5 as she watched Lizzie run out of the tree house and down to the ground below.  
  
I won't cast the first stone or leave the first mark  
  
But I will leave a lasting impression  
  
You believe what you want and you've said what's been said  
  
And I do hope you learn a lesson  
  
I do hope you learn a lesson  
  
"Number 5 just did you a favor boss. Does Number 5 get the rest of the day off?" asked Number 5.  
Number 1 stood up, looked at Number 5 and kissed her on the lips, and said, "No Number 5, but thanks for asking anyway."  
  
What's your problem?  
  
Can't you see it?  
  
And you go and blow it  
  
Like everyone knows you will  
  
After that day, Lizzie stayed far away from Number 1, but tried to get with the other male members of the KND. Thankfully, she failed with Numbers 2,4, and 274 and gave up on boys.   
  
Why don't you get it together now?  
  
Failure's not flattering  
  
When will you show yourself?  
  
When will you show yourself?  
  
I do hope you learn a lesson  
  
You'll never learn your lesson  
  
  
  
What's your problem?  
  
Can't you see it?  
  
And you go and blow it  
  
Like everyone knows you will  
  
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I hope everybody here liked my fic. I know this fic sucks completely, but please review. Flames and reviews are welcome.  
  
NewFoundDude 


	2. Ch 2: Author's Alert

Disclaimer: I don't own the KND or Cartoon Network. So don't sue

Hey whats up fans, NFD here with an update. I've chosen this songfic to make this an actual story. That's right, Failure's Not Flattering will be an actual story in a few weeks or so, so look for it and send a review/flame my way.

Peace out

NewFoundDude


End file.
